mar's Desk

marcoujor: Listen Up

7/5/2017

Have you ever heard the expression, “Save your drama for your Momma”?

I’m sure the person who started this ‘craze phrase’ never met my Momma.

That being said, the safest place in the world for me was in Mom’s living room.

I quickly learned that I could tell Mom anything. Mom was fine if I cried. Mom remained quiet, looking me in the eyes. I knew Mom was listening to every word I said and didn’t say.

Mom was not known for dispensing advice. She wore a moral overcoat that served her well. The fabric of this coat was simple.

❣Actions speak louder than words

❣Be honest. Tell the truth

❣Carry yourself like a lady

Mom always seemed so calm. Her silence could speak volumes if something was amiss.

Mom told it like it was, period. Her bottom line focused on her behaviors and those behaviors occurring under her roof. Her example taught that love and decency didn’t boil down to finances or gadgets.

Mom didn’t rely on emotional outbursts or a stream of obscenities to make a point.

I remind myself of my ‘slightly altered’ overcoat - more and more these days.

❣Actions speak louder than words. Listen for what is not being said. Know the limits of your promised actions.

❣Be honest. Tell the truth if you are asked. Understand that not everyone is asking, or ready for the truth.

❣Carry yourself like a lady and a professional. It’s OK to walk away - in fact, it’s preferable.

No matter the issue, we need to tease out our accountability for and the amount of control we have in the resolution/resultant coping with the situation. All the while, we need to remember to own our role and to allow others to own theirs.

I welcome your thoughts in the comment section if you are so inclined. And I promise, for the most part, to just listen. 😊

ShoutOuts

☙ Dog Paddlin' on the Sunshine Coast via WarnerWords

☙ Misnomers about our wild horses, burros and other news

☙ The Old 7... She was Great via Fireside with Rolly

Until next week, sending hugs and peace,

mar

18 Comments

Vicki link

7/5/2017 08:53:17 am

Dear Mareer,
Good reminders from your dear Momma! I especially liked
"All the while, we need to remember to own our role and to allow others to own theirs."
That is very wise, and lifts the burden from very well- meaning folks sometimes. You can only help to a certain level. After that you have to exit stage left, and it's up to others to own their part of the issue.
Love that song.
Thanks for your wise words. Hope whoever this is meant for is listening!
Love and hugs,
Vickster

Maria link

7/6/2017 07:05:36 am

Dear Vickster,

Thank you for totally getting this post - written with the wisdom of Miss Sammie.

I think your wish came true ... :) Glad you enjoyed one of my all time favorite songs.

Love and hugs to you, mareer

Kimmie

7/5/2017 09:16:31 am

Good morning my friend
Very wise post! Your mom was a wealth of good advice and certainly a great example! Own our own and let others own theirs without tryinging to own it our selves! Does that sum up a small portion ? Lol
Thank you for sharing
Kimmie

Maria link

7/6/2017 07:11:04 am

Dear Kimmie,

Your summarization of this post is wonderful - like you - thanks!

Thinking of you during these busy days.

Sending love and peace, Maria

Rolly A. Chabot link

7/5/2017 11:55:10 am

Hi Maria...
Love the photo and Mom's steadfast manner and teachings have not fallen far from the tree. Our lives are all built on foundations, the success or failure in life comes from a solid footing.
That footing is based on basic principles and values, with them we can weather any storm in life.
You are a very fortunate lady to have both had the teachings but more so for grasping them and building your life on them.
Great article my friend...

Hugs from Alberta

Maria link

7/6/2017 07:15:03 am

Aw thanks, dear Rolly - I love that picture as well, taken on a beautiful Mother's Day with my best girl.

I am so blessed for the solid footing I received in childhood. It has helped while traveling some rocky roads through life for sure.

Thanks for the visit and the hugs. Hugs to you, Maria

paula link

7/5/2017 01:08:22 pm

Maria...This short tidbit packs a WALLOP! No need for me to explain "why," I'm certain. Still the l-o-n-g-winded emails continue (although going to my spam folder, for all the good that does!) I am maintaining, GF.
Giving brief, non-substantial comments in the threads, which I'm considering may not be a good idea, just because I feel the need to be somewhat"nice." Oh Lord, help me. "This too, shall pass."....right? I can only hope.
Preparing to fly west soon! Montana first, to see my precious niece and her lovely family. Then down to sunny Cali-For-Nia, to see gorgeous son #1, wife & daughter!! Actually getting excited despite how hugely I despise airports! I'll grin and bear my way through....my sweet son says he's taking me shopping for a NEW computer! God, Maria, my sons are so very good to their Mama. I'm blessed beyond that which I deserve....well, No, perhaps I do deserve it but I don't expect it! They and their wives and awesome kids are the true loves of my life. OK...enough about my fabulous kids. What would you like to know about my 12 grandchildren? Got a few weeks to spare?
Love your Mama almost as much as I love my own. Wise women they were!! and just LOOK at the fabulous daughters they churned out!! LOL...modest too!
Hope y'all had a great 4th!! Love & Hugs, Effer

Maria link

7/6/2017 07:23:34 am

Hi Paula,

Your comment packs a wallop too!

Now you know as well as I do that 'everything passes', right on?

You shine when talking of your precious, huge and beautiful family. I'm wishing you days of pure joy - soaking in all the fun, laughter and memories in the making. Glad your son can help guide you to the perfect computer for you.

Bring a good book for the plane time - knowing you, you'll be too busy people watching ;) Love you much, Maria

Mike

7/5/2017 01:12:40 pm

Happy Wednesday. We can always rely on Miss Sammie to set the course straight. Some very good lessons to be found here, for sure. Often I am remind myself what role I am expected to play.

Maria link

7/6/2017 08:04:43 am

You and me both - about that role thing, dear Mike... :)

You're right about Miss Sammie - I count on her wisdom more than ever - never lets me down.

Hugs and thanks for the visit, Maria

Martie link

7/5/2017 01:57:38 pm

Dear Mar, your mother was most certainly a lady and the ideal mother. I can see her beautiful stamp clearly on you.

Hugs,
Martie

Maria link

7/6/2017 08:06:19 am

Dear Martie,

You have bestowed the greatest compliment to me - thank you from my heart.

Love and hugs to you, mar

Sannel Larson link

7/6/2017 12:30:47 pm

Dear Maria,

I have always loved that beautiful picture of you and your Mom. I always wondered if it was a birthday or Mother's Day gift she was holding in her hands. Now I know. :) Miss Sammie's good sense and wisdom helped raise her daughter into the beautiful, loving and very wise woman she is today. Just like your Mom, you are truly a first class and amazing lady in every possible way.
Thank you for a wonderful and inspiring read.
Take care of yourself.
Love you lots!
Hugs,
Sannel

Maria link

7/13/2017 06:23:31 am

Dear Sannel,

Thank you for such a beautiful comment. You and your visits are always appreciated.

Hoping all is well with you and Freddie. Love, Maria

Angelia Phillips link

7/12/2017 10:52:12 am

Prof. Mahreer,

Your mama had to be one of the coolest folks ever created. I love that you continue to feature her in your posts. They're deep, yet simple enough for everyone to glean good things from.

The blessings of her work continue through you in person and here, too. :)

Maria link

7/13/2017 06:25:46 am

Oh yes, Ange - Mom was definitely cool.

The thought of her legacy living on is comforting and more needed now than ever.

Thanks for stopping by. Love ya, mar

crazyhorseladycx

7/21/2017 02:21:29 pm

howdy, ms. mar!

can ya tell i'm 'hind yet 'gain? lol seems to be my mantra this year...

i so would'a loved to've met'cher sweet momma! what a gift 'n how fortunate to've grown 'nder her kind 'n watchful eye. the world'd be a better place if'n more like her 'xisted.

big hugs 'n love!

Maria link

7/24/2017 06:43:09 am

Welcome to the "Catch up" Club, dear Lady - I'm a permanent member...!

I wish Mom could have met you and my other virtual pals as well - and I couldn't agree with you more.

Have a peaceful week. Hugs, mar

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