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  marcoujor's musings

mar's Desk

​This multi-topic blog publishes weekly on Wednesdays.
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marcoujor: Stepping Out

1/31/2018

20 Comments

 
Picture
I abruptly stepped out of my nursing management career track in June, 1999. I’d like to believe that this was the only decision in my adult life that was made for me.

Today, almost nineteen years later, I feel blessed in my work with students and professional colleagues in the university setting.

Actually, I can’t imagine wanting to be a manager or boss (of any kind) ever again. I have a great admiration for most bosses I have reported to over the years. I have an even greater appreciation of the
unique stressors they face on a daily basis.

I believe that each of us are in possession of our own unique stressors - whether personal, professional, situational, chronic, expected, unexpected or anywhere in between.
Picture
Image via geralt (Gerd Altmann) of Pixabay. Click here to visit his gallery.
I find myself unconsciously applying a leadership strategy I learned in what seems another lifetime (aka the 1980s). Summarizing this principle in an (implied) statement, it would go something like this...
“Please hold my place on the dancefloor. I’m stepping out to the balcony for a bit.”
I admit to using this concept in a variety of ways on countless occasions - in both personal and professional matters. I step away, even if only for a couple moments, from chaos, noise or confusion that is not life - threatening.     

While I cannot remember the source or the author, this link to an article written by Russ Linden  more than adequately elaborates on this basic principle - as much a staple in my ‘interpersonal menu’ as fruits and vegetables are to my diet.

My (symbolic) balcony allows me to return to a tumultuous situation with a clear head about what, if anything, I can contribute towards a positive outcome.

Oh, and no surprise that my interpersonal menu has some musical selections du jour … and please, enjoy the silence and clarity that one can find ‘on the balcony’:
I thought this quotation from Adam West (yes, Batman…!!) was a fitting way to conclude this week’s desk post:
"Over the years, I've learned that if you can just hang in there and, regardless of what's presented to you, take it as a challenge and try to bring in something fresh, then it works."

ShoutOuts

☙ Addictive hobbies via Martie’s Foyer
☙ Carfentanyl -The Newest Scourge via WarnerWords
☙ Alternative Milks for Acid Reflux Relief via flashPress

Until next week, remember that peace is preferable, starting from within.

Hugs,

mar
20 Comments
Laraine Amoia-Watters
1/31/2018 09:26:22 am

Love the stepping out for a moment. I often send my students "to the window" and away from their stress...Looking out the window for the moment allows them some clarity !

Reply
Maria link
2/1/2018 06:35:01 am

Going to the window works just as well, dear LAW - a wonderful strategy from a wonderful instructor!.

Reply
Peg link
1/31/2018 09:34:55 am

I definitely do not miss the stress of managing people, performing performance reviews, doing monthly reports, making quotas and the other corporate baggage. Stepping away seems like a great way to put things into perspective when the pressure is on. Love the music choices.

Reply
Maria link
2/1/2018 06:36:13 am

You and me both as far as not missing those management days, dear Peg.

So happy you enjoyed the musical selections as well.

Reply
Susie
1/31/2018 10:16:18 am

The image from Gerd Altmann is really so "spot on". As usual, your writing is beautiful. Thank you for the weekly input and sharing your "anniversary"...love you Mareer!

Reply
Maria link
2/1/2018 06:37:31 am

Susie,

You are a smile maker with your mere presence.

Thanks for this visit. Love you too, mareer

Reply
Martie link
1/31/2018 02:45:29 pm

Your excellent advice encourages some serious introspection, dear Maria. Perhaps I should step out more frequently...

Simon and Garfunkel's "Sound of Silence" is one of my favorites.

Lots of hugs to you ♥

Martie

Reply
Maria link
2/1/2018 06:38:58 am

Glad this post got you thinking, dear Martie.

Hope you are having a peaceful week. Love, mar

Reply
Mike Friedman
1/31/2018 02:59:14 pm

I have not heard 'Silence is Golden' in quite a while. Thanks for the musical hit parade. I left management abruptly, though not as abruptly as you. Your metaphorical balcony is great advice. There is a Wiley Coyote joke in there somewhere. It will come to me after I submit this comment. Now to go pitch a tent out on that balcony.

Reply
Maria link
2/1/2018 06:40:19 am

Glad you enjoyed this musical hit parade, dear Mike.

Meet you on the balcony... :)

Reply
Sannel link
1/31/2018 04:25:46 pm

Dear Maria,

“Please hold my place on the dancefloor. I’m stepping out to the balcony for a bit.” Love it! What a wonderful concept to follow. :) From now on, I will do just that when the pressure is on. Thank you for meaningful advice along with some great, great music.
Love you!
Hugs,
Sannel

Reply
Maria link
2/1/2018 06:41:46 am

So glad you found some worthwhile thoughts and music in this week's post, dear Sannel.

Love and hugs to you and sweet Freddie too!

Reply
Cynthia link
1/31/2018 09:09:14 pm

First, being in a position of leadership is StREsSFuL. Lordy! In my two-year stint running the after school program, I used to wake up in the night worried about the welfare of those kids, everyone's safety, what kind of boss I was and if I was fair, personnel decisions, what all was best for the program, juggling interpersonal relations between the school district, the university, the after school site, and the elementary school itself...and...and...when our funding ran out last July it was bittersweet: I was sad for the kids that they wouldn't have this place to go anymore. But I was also relieved to not have to be "in charge" anymore. The stress is part of what drove me to 60 minutes of meditation a day! I have a newfound respect for people in positions of leadership within organizations - to the point where I've noticed the director of the school where I am working now has been under more stress and I've checked in with her a time or two to be sure she's all right. Before I was a director, I never knew the exquisite stress that comes from "being in charge" and now I'm perfectly content NOT being in charge, thank you very much. But that also means that I learned a lot about people and about myself and what I want out of life. So, I understand where you're coming from with what you're saying here.
As for the songs, ALL of them are so good! I love this selection - especially the "silence" and "heart" themes. Well done. All songs I enjoy. It's been so long since I listened to a Depeche Mode soundtrack. :)
I hope you've had a good Wednesday! Sending you hugs and wishes for a wonderful rest-of-your-week. :)

Reply
Maria link
2/1/2018 06:51:31 am

Dear Cynthia,

Our styles are similar regarding the vigilance, worry and stress that comes with positions of management.

As hard as this time was, I'm sure it must have built our characters even more, eh?

How cool that you love Depeche Mode as well...

Thanks for your wonderful comment and have a peaceful week.

Love, Maria

Reply
Paula
2/1/2018 01:13:35 am

Maria.....I love that you bring us such common sense, practical inspiration. So often, all it takes is a comment from a wise friend, to help us smooth out some annoying wrinkles in our lives.
I will assure you, I've taken to hanging out on that balcony on a regular basis, girlfriend! The AIR is great out there & clears out the cob webs...not to mention the amazing view!! Love you, Paula

Reply
Maria link
2/1/2018 06:53:18 am

Not surprising that I'd find you on the balcony as well, dear Paula.

Thanks for your kind and supportive words. Love you too!

Reply
Angelia link
2/4/2018 01:57:44 pm

Prof. Mahreer,

The older I get the better the balcony looks. Crickets chirps make a great background for problem solving. :)

Reply
Maria link
2/5/2018 09:22:06 am

I'm with you, dear Ange - I also love the sound of crickets, especially when sitting outside with the stars... Hugs, mar

Reply
Rolly A. Chabot link
2/6/2018 03:09:35 pm

Hi Mar...

Sorry for the delay in getting to your post. This is great advice as my dance card if I may call it that has become very full of late.
One of the many reasons we should set healthy boundaries... hard to say no when there is a need and we are called on. Great selection of music...

Hugs from Alberta

Reply
Maria link
2/12/2018 11:03:18 am

We are indeed two peas in a pod, dear Rolly.

Glad you continue to do so much good for others and that you find time to get that self-care balance in the mix...

Love and big hugs from PA, mar

Reply



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    Marcoujor

    Welcome to my desk...

    I am a work in progress, so a rule of thumb is to expect the unexpected every week!

    Pull up a comfy chair and make yourself at home.

    Thank you,

    mar  



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