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mar's Desk

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Marcoujor: Take Care of Yourself

6/3/2015

14 Comments

 
Picturemarcoujor
Since I was a little girl, I have loved to write letters and send cards, for any reason.  Some of my fondest memories were reciprocal correspondence with my Georgian relatives.  I still maintain close contact with family and friends, no matter where they live. 

Each June, I send out a fair number of retirement and graduation cards to friends and colleagues.  Always written in some fashion on these cards is the expression: "take care of yourself!"

I have been a nurse for over 30 years.  Until 1999, I didn't "take very good care of myself".  Almost dying is a fabulous wake - up call about the importance of now!

It’s puzzling why society, in general, places self care on the back-burner.  Some of the reasons commonly discussed in my classroom include:  family (kids, spouse, and parents); work (stress from colleagues, bills, unemployment issues, time and sleep issues); health (self, loved ones); higher education (time, tuition).


Picture
Andy Jordan
Picture
It was inspiring to encounter a student who credited his three young sons for helping him "act like a kid", every day, even for a short while.  He reminded us how important it is to take time to play.  As a nurse, he remained optimistic and grateful that he could go home, after a stressful day, to his beautiful family. 

Teaching nurses who are pursuing an advanced degree, I am overwhelmed by the stressors they face.  I urge you to thank the next nurse who cares for you.  Sometimes that heartfelt gratitude makes all the difference.

I fully appreciate that every job has a degree of stress.  Today, there is even additional worry with our unemployment rate; and talented people are searching for work. So stressed folks thinks they don’t have the time to take care of themselves - a vicious circle when you think about it... 

This makes it even more important to take care of ourselves on a physical, mental, and spiritual level. 


Come to think of it, I write "take care of yourself" on most every type of note I send!  I feel strongly about this!  I consider self care a life saver!  I assert that self care is NOT selfish..!

My physical body carries me through the life that God has given me.  Each day I experience nature and enjoy some kinds of healthy foods.

My mind helps me think about issues with clarity and meaning.  Each day I exercise it somehow by being creative, social and interactive with those I care about. 

My soul keeps me aligned with my purpose in the Universe.  Each day I spend time in quiet prayer, meditation and contemplation to develop self awareness and growth. 

For me, music touches my body, mind, and soul. Music serves as a form of self-expression and stress relief - helping me to relax as needed through my day. I even have selected music for techniques like deep breathing and progressive muscle relaxation. 

I’ve been catching up on visiting friends as my summer teaching schedule is a bit lighter.  One of my friends has become the caregiver for his wife and another is being cared for by her husband.  In one situation, my friend has been able to hire a home health aide to take care of his wife for eight hours each day.  In the other situation, my friend’s husband assumes all the care for my friend- reluctant to accept help from others even when assistance is offered. 

It makes sense, eventually, if you don’t take care of yourself, you will not only not be able to care for your loved one, but you may need help yourself. It may feel selfish in the short-term to go out for dinner or take a nap while someone else cares for your loved one. It may even feel selfish to take 10 minutes listening to music and breathing when there is laundry to be done and appointments to be scheduled. Such is not the case.

You need to take care of yourself, too. You cannot carry the weight of the world on your shoulders indefinitely.

Make the time for self-care, so that you and your loved one can stay healthier and happier for as long as possible.

If you had an hour a day, how would you take care of yourself...? What song would you listen to, or even sing...? Here is one for you:

"THE KNOWLEDGE THAT A GOOD BOOK IS AWAITING ONE AT THE END OF A LONG DAY MAKES THAT DAY HAPPIER."  (KATHLEEN NORRIS)
Here’s some words worthy of checking out in Weeblyhood:

  • Pileated Woodpecker: Observations of a New Family via Bravewarrior's Feathered Pen
  • Rita Davis on Ava Anderson's Non-toxic, Responsibly Resourced, Non-animal Tested Awesomeness! via flashPress
  • Angela Mobley: A Bouquet of Radishes via WarnerWords
  • Sunshine in the Forecast via marcoujor's musings

Until next week, take care of yourself. 

Hugs,

mar

14 Comments
Shauna
6/3/2015 01:19:17 am

What a beautiful and necessary reminder, Mar. We tend to put ourselves last and that's not good for anyone. We can't take care of others and give of ourselves if we don't keep our body, mind, and spirit strong and healthy.

I love the song you chose. You've started my day off on a very cheerful note.

Reply
Maria link
6/3/2015 01:07:12 pm

Dear Sha,
Your comment is wise and I totally agree with you. So happy I started your day with one of my favorite songs. Love and hugs, Mar

Reply
Vicki link
6/3/2015 01:37:41 am

Dear Mareer,
You are so right with this! Actually caring for yourself with life stressors all around you becomes more and more important, especially as you often don't recognise it as a need for yourself, or, as you note, you think it's selfish.
My sweet guy here notices when I'm starting to lag in this area. He's suddenly booked three days at a resort further up our coast to get me away from everyday life. I'm so looking forward to it, and trying to get my mind into relax mode.
But it really doesn't matter how you do it, it's just so important to regularly take time for yourself. I'm always glad to see you do this, my friend.
Ohh, that "I'm king of all I survey" look on that black dawg's face is just priceless! Mischief lives here! Hope he wiped his paws ahead of getting onto the white bedcovers, but I'm doubting it!!
Your music is always great! And always perfect for its purpose.
Love you, and look after yourself, dear Mareer!

Reply
Maria link
6/3/2015 01:12:48 pm

Dear Vicki,
Hope you are having a peaceful and relaxing getaway with your sweet guy - what a lovely surprise.
Perfect description of my dawg - "I'm king of all I survey". Wiping paws? I think not...but thank heavens for easy -wash bed linens.
Looks like I picked a song many of us like - cool!
Love and hugs, mareer

Reply
femmeflashpoint link
6/3/2015 01:43:43 am

Coffee with The Carpenters. Works for me! The Carpenter I'm accustomed to visiting while enjoying coffee with my Sonrise is possibly just as fond of their music as I am.

Their tunes definitely put a smile on a great many faces during their career and brought on wonderful episodes of the feel goods, which we all need and probably in much larger doses than many are taking time for in their day-to-day routines.

femme

Reply
Maria link
6/3/2015 01:16:31 pm

Dear femme,
You describe such a serene Sonrise and I'm happy the Carpenters added to your enjoyment.
Your insights and ongoing support are appreciated, as is your friendship. Love you, mar

Reply
Mike
6/3/2015 03:46:14 am

Well, there is certainly some good advice to find here. Let's see if I had an hour a day, what would I do? I'll have to give that some thought. Mr. Andy seems to have lost is puppish look.

Reply
Maria link
6/3/2015 01:19:32 pm

Yes, Mike...one hour 'just for you'...that means not helping anyone...hmmmmm, wowza?!

Mr. Andy is puppy in a little man's 'very strong' body...trust me :)

Reply
Martie link
6/3/2015 05:11:23 am

Well-needed advice, thank you, Mar! We have to kill the slave-driver in us, or he will kill us.

Beautiful picture of Andy!

Take care of yourself, cuz you're precious :)



Reply
Maria link
6/3/2015 01:37:37 pm

Oh my, Martie...I never thought I'd sanction killing but you are "oh so right"...!! We better both get busy...LOL.

And you take care of yourself too, you precious Sista!

Reply
Sunshine
6/3/2015 05:59:38 am

Hi MM, As a fellow lover of writing letters your message today reminded me of how I use to sign off...take care of yourself, for some reason over time, I stopped writing that, it was shortened to take care, then that vanished too. I'm not sure why, but thanks to your reminder I'm bringing it back!!
So you take care of yourself and I will try my best to practice what I preach :)

Reply
Maria link
6/3/2015 01:40:27 pm

I know you can't help yourself, but you sure do make me smile, Sunshine. :))

Take extra special care of yourself and give Cap a hug too, MM

Reply
Theresa
6/4/2015 04:02:57 pm

Hi Maria,

I am learning to take time for myself more often than I used too : ) ...especially after working such long hours here of late, like tonight ...arrived home from the city around 8:00 p.m. My hubby is a blessing as he had the salmon grilled, broccoli steamed and music playing. So, I ignored all of the piled up laundry and propped my feet up and enjoyed myself. Laughter for me does the trick to really reduce stress, and thankfully now at work, our new big boss loves to laugh a lot, and, of course, we all know when it is time to be serious. It helps so much to laugh with others, especially when we are charged with such serious issues each day and in the public limelight. Reading too, at the end of the day for even just a bit, is such a treat for me. I have to have my music on my hour commute to and fro for sure! I would not be a pretty sight when I reached my destination ...LOL. I have always loved receiving your thoughtful cards and notes with your wise words shared to take care or sometimes I remember you writing, "Be careful with yourself". Sir Andy looks so distinguished there! Our fur babies are sure a way to help with stress with their unconditional love. Lovely song choice too. You take care of yourself dear friend.

Love,

Theresa

Reply
Maria link
6/30/2015 08:02:35 am

Such beautiful comment, dear Theresa...and as I am trying to 'take time for myself and organize...LOL...", I am discovering some comments I am way behind on answering...

thank you for this lovely and detailed response. I also believe in the power of laughter, music and keeping a healthy life balance. And I know you get as much comfort from you fur babies as we do our Andy.

Hope all is well and that you are having a peaceful day. Love, Maria

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    Marcoujor

    Welcome to my desk...

    I am a work in progress, so a rule of thumb is to expect the unexpected every week!

    Pull up a comfy chair and make yourself at home.

    Thank you,

    mar  



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