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mar's Desk

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Marcoujor: The Charitable Spirit

12/23/2015

16 Comments

 
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Picturemarcoujor


Winter, Spring, Summer or Fall....

Are you a kind, compassionate and forgiving person? 

Some of us are situationally charitable. Christmas and Thanksgiving in America are the perfect opportunities for a variety of altruistic acts. At other times in the year, the demands of family, work and other personal stressors are ever on the front burner. Charity begins at home is a familiar mantra.​

Still some view life as being of service to others. This may be shown in one's career, avocation or general manner of living. There is an ongoing awareness and concern for the welfare of others.

In either scenario, it certainly seems easier to be charitable when it is your choice. Organizing food and clothing drives, taking a senior to a doctor's appointment or making a donation to a meaningful charity can provide satisfaction, purpose and fulfillment.

Through good and bad times

​No one is immune from hard times. It is rarely a deliberate choice, I believe, to be saddled with unexpected medical, financial or interpersonal hardships. Issues such as cancer, unemployment and domestic abuse are just a smattering of tragedies that show no societal discrimination.

Some of us appear more immune from the effects of hard times than others. For me, I assume an outer shell that allows me to see those I love and those students I teach as having issues greater than mine. I am forever placing life events in proper perspective and appreciating how blessed I truly am.

I readily admit the role that control plays in my life. I like when questions have answers. I appreciate when problems have possible solutions. I have a need to understand the whole picture. I can understand my role and do something ...

I allow plenty of down time in the control department. Raking, scrubbing and tears, accompanied by my energetic puppy, Andy, are typical ways that I express my helplessness and frustration about a situation.  Inner peace is regained during these frenzied activities.

When your presence is the present

I have recognized a need to compose myself spirtually and emotionally when faced with a situation where getting well / feeling better soon are not options.

I have seen many individuals in pain or watching loved one's suffer and every response is so different. I am not convinced that one response is better than another.

When I focus on my composure, I am composed. This allows me to remove myself mentally from the equation and totally immerse myself into someone else/ or something tangible I can do instead. I become present for that person, truly listening to what they need from me.

Sometimes we need to be left alone. I respect that if I am being given verbal and non - verbal cues.

Sometimes, albeit rarely, we request an answer to a question. Most individuals are amazingly intuitive about themselves. As family, I always remember to do what that individual would want. As a nurse, I always maintain ethical boundaries and hope the best outcome occurs for each unique situation.

Some of the most meaningful encounters were ones where I say very little. Whenever possible, I use hand holding as a comfort and support, actually for both of us. Therapeutic and loving touch is more important than ever at these times.

When we think about what we have the power of accomplishing with touch, holding someone's hand has a profound benefit. We can help someone feel alive, worthwhile and truly beautiful.

Mom taught me time and time agin that actions speak louder than words... I think she'd approve of these actions any time of year.

​WORDS = ACTION​

C ~ compassion with care
H ~ hold the door; be polite
A ~ avoid the blame game
R ~ reach out if you can
I ~ imagine why people cry
T ~ take the time to look
A ~ awareness of strife
B ~ believe the best in others
L ~ lend a hand daily
E ~ entertain strangers
 

S ~ stop to smile and say hello
P ~ participation
I ~ involved in good cause
R ~ respecting the Golden Rule
I ~ isolation hurts
T ~ trust, hope and have faith.

​Wishing you and yours a blessed and happy Christmas...sharing a favorite song by Annie Lenox to get into the spirit. 
16 Comments
Bill
12/23/2015 09:46:15 am

Beautifully stated my dear friend. We need a whole lot of compassion and love this holiday season, and beyond. Thank you for the reminder, and Merry Christmas to all.

love,
bill

Reply
Maria link
12/23/2015 07:48:19 pm

Thanks, dear Bill ~ always a pleasure seeing you.

Merry Christmas to you and Bev.

Love, Maria

Reply
Mike
12/23/2015 10:02:36 am

Hello mar. Thank you for sharing your beautiful thoughts for the season and throughtout the year. Raking, scrubbing and tears, sounds almost like a Three Dog Night song. haha. All good cheer to you and yours as the season embraces us all.

Reply
Maria link
12/23/2015 07:53:47 pm

Thanks for the smiles, dear Mike.

Andy wants top spot in 'Three Dog Night'... he is like a 'dog with a bone' when getting an idea in his noggin...

Merry Christmas to you and yours. Hugs, mar

Reply
Martie link
12/23/2015 11:38:54 am

I love those actions of the charity spirit - a perfect guideline!

I do believe that we are all born with an obligation to serve our fellow-man. Whoever is not a servant in one way or another can't even be dead, as even the people who are no longer with us are serving the living via the good they have done.

Mar, you are a perfect example of a kind, compassionate and forgiving person.

Have a wonderful, merry and peaceful Christmas!

Reply
Maria link
12/23/2015 08:09:07 pm

Dear Martie,

Thanks for your profoundly wise remarks.

Your friendship and loving support means the world to me.

Merry, peaceful Christmas to you too.
Love you, mar

Reply
femmeflashpoint link
12/23/2015 03:36:45 pm

Prof. Mahreer,

You are an awesome example of a charitable spirit! I also loved what Martie said about many of those who have passed on are still serving those of us still here due to the good actions they performed while they were still with us.

I love the pic of your beautiful home all lit up!

I pray your Christmas is abundantly blessed and that this year your tip jar is filled to overflowing!

femme

Reply
Maria link
12/23/2015 08:30:10 pm

Dear femme,
Thanks for all of your help and friendship over this year.
Wishing you and yours a blessed, peaceful Christmas too.
Love and hugs, mar

Reply
Pamela Oglesby
12/23/2015 06:56:00 pm

I wish you and your family a wonderful Christmas. I love your house with all the lights. Blessings to you all.

Reply
Maria link
12/23/2015 08:37:08 pm

Wonderful to see you, dear Pam.

Happy, blessed Christmas to you and yours too.

Reply
Theresa
12/24/2015 10:31:26 pm

Beautiful reminder of the special blessing of giving of ourselves, dear Maria. You are the perfect one to share this message of giving of oneself. Special blessings and much love to you and yours this Christmas Eve, Theresa

Reply
Maria link
12/29/2015 08:29:06 am

What a magical Christmas season as we welcome sweet Charlie into your lives.

Wishing you and those you love a blessed and peaceful 2016, dear Theresa.

Love and hugs, Maria

Reply
Sannel link
12/28/2015 06:29:58 am

Dearest Maria,

Thank you for sharing your very wise and beautiful thoughts with us all. We all need to be reminded once in awhile. Your constant support and loving friendship means the world to me, dear one.
Your house and with lights and decorations are beautiful, but where is that little dog in the window? ;)
I hope you had a happy and blessed Christmas.
My love and hugs to you,
Sannel

Reply
Maria link
12/29/2015 08:39:14 am

Hoping you and Freddie had a peaceful and happy Christmas.

My doggie is in that window every chance he gets...as President of Town Watch...😛

Love and thanks for being such a dear friend, Maria

Reply
Peg Cole link
12/28/2015 03:26:42 pm

Profound thoughts on giving and demonstrating our charitable side particularly during the holidays and Christmas, yet, so necessary all year long. I love your way of dealing with the stress. Your composure shines through in your words and songs.
Love to you and beloved Andy, BFAM to Tony and Indy.

Reply
Maria link
12/29/2015 08:43:50 am

Thanks, SFAM...my composure is important to me.

Hoping you are all settling in after those tornados...it is teeming rain here these last few days.

Love to you and your sweet tribe,
Maria and Andy

Reply



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    Marcoujor

    Welcome to my desk...

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    mar  



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