Marcoujor: The Charitable Spirit

marcoujor

Winter, Spring, Summer or Fall....

Are you a kind, compassionate and forgiving person? 

Some of us are situationally charitable. Christmas and Thanksgiving in America are the perfect opportunities for a variety of altruistic acts. At other times in the year, the demands of family, work and other personal stressors are ever on the front burner. Charity begins at home is a familiar mantra.​

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Still some view life as being of service to others. This may be shown in one's career, avocation or general manner of living. There is an ongoing awareness and concern for the welfare of others.

In either scenario, it certainly seems easier to be charitable when it is your choice. Organizing food and clothing drives, taking a senior to a doctor's appointment or making a donation to a meaningful charity can provide satisfaction, purpose and fulfillment.

Through good and bad times

​No one is immune from hard times. It is rarely a deliberate choice, I believe, to be saddled with unexpected medical, financial or interpersonal hardships. Issues such as cancer, unemployment and domestic abuse are just a smattering of tragedies that show no societal discrimination.

Some of us appear more immune from the effects of hard times than others. For me, I assume an outer shell that allows me to see those I love and those students I teach as having issues greater than mine. I am forever placing life events in proper perspective and appreciating how blessed I truly am.

I readily admit the role that control plays in my life. I like when questions have answers. I appreciate when problems have possible solutions. I have a need to understand the whole picture. I can understand my role and do something ...

I allow plenty of down time in the control department. Raking, scrubbing and tears, accompanied by my energetic puppy, Andy, are typical ways that I express my helplessness and frustration about a situation.  Inner peace is regained during these frenzied activities.

When your presence is the present

I have recognized a need to compose myself spirtually and emotionally when faced with a situation where getting well / feeling better soon are not options.

I have seen many individuals in pain or watching loved one's suffer and every response is so different. I am not convinced that one response is better than another.

When I focus on my composure, I am composed. This allows me to remove myself mentally from the equation and totally immerse myself into someone else/ or something tangible I can do instead. I become present for that person, truly listening to what they need from me.

Sometimes we need to be left alone. I respect that if I am being given verbal and non - verbal cues.

Sometimes, albeit rarely, we request an answer to a question. Most individuals are amazingly intuitive about themselves. As family, I always remember to do what that individual would want. As a nurse, I always maintain ethical boundaries and hope the best outcome occurs for each unique situation.

Some of the most meaningful encounters were ones where I say very little. Whenever possible, I use hand holding as a comfort and support, actually for both of us. Therapeutic and loving touch is more important than ever at these times.

When we think about what we have the power of accomplishing with touch, holding someone's hand has a profound benefit. We can help someone feel alive, worthwhile and truly beautiful.

Mom taught me time and time agin that actions speak louder than words... I think she'd approve of these actions any time of year.

​WORDS = ACTION​

C ~ compassion with care
H ~ hold the door; be polite
A ~ avoid the blame game
R ~ reach out if you can
I ~ imagine why people cry
T ~ take the time to look
A ~ awareness of strife
B ~ believe the best in others
L ~ lend a hand daily
E ~ entertain strangers
 

S ~ stop to smile and say hello
P ~ participation
I ~ involved in good cause
R ~ respecting the Golden Rule
I ~ isolation hurts
T ~ trust, hope and have faith.

​Wishing you and yours a blessed and happy Christmas...sharing a favorite song by Annie Lenox to get into the spirit.