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mar's Desk

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marcoujor: Sleep on it

7/6/2016

18 Comments

 
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I posed the question in a recent survey sent to fifty family, friends and colleagues: What matters?

I based this question on this quote by Jonathan Kozol: "Pick battles big enough to matter and small enough to win."

Sleep On It

Mom was wise in so many ways. There are many phrases and sayings in my toolbox of life skills that are straight out of her mouth. The following are a few of the many expressions I learned from Miss Sammie.

  • Sleeping on it. If it still really matters in the morning “that's another story.”
  • Putting some things “on the back burner.” While neither of us were ever great cooks, family, education, work and responsibilities mattered first and foremost.
  • Remembering “not to bite off more than I can chew.” Oh how I still struggle with this every day. I may just get there one day!
  • Not “burning the candle at both ends.” For some strange reason, the older I get, the easier this gets! These days I just burn scented votive candles.
  • Everyone has priorities. In my professional experience as a nurse, I have seen a wide range of judgment, wisdom and insight where these priorities are concerned. I may not assume that what matters to me, actually matters to someone else.  I am getting better at asserting that what matters to someone else, does not have to become my pressing cause or priority.
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When tomorrow comes...

​None of us know what tomorrow will bring.

Although I try to be organized to a fault, even I realize I cannot plan the timing or nature of my death.

So much of life is a crap shoot. Despite having a deep faith and base of spirituality, I recognize that very little of life is within our control.

So why would death be any different? Death is a part of life.

Mom had a way of being both cut and dry and comfortingly tender about life and death issues. Some of her expressions that I think of to this day are...
“When it's your time to go, it's your time to go.” This was sometimes even accompanied by a, “You can't fight City Hall.”

 “Keep your house ready. Always be prepared.” Through this attitude and mindset, I learned how to prioritize what truly matters.
​For me, when someone or something is truly special to me, nurturing that relationship or issue is of utmost priority. In our family, this maternal attitude translated to stepping up when family and friends need us. I have learned that what matters is respecting the wishes of your loved one.

I believe there is a country and western song written about everything that matters.  My selection for this week focuses on the every day things that can bring on the smiles, by Willie Nelson’s Little Things Mean a Lot.

​Check out these responses from some of those I sent the questionnaire survey to, asking, "What matters most to you?" 
  • My family's health, emotional as well as physical.
  • Honesty, integrity, faith, character, family values.
  • Loving myself and others and knowing my truth.
  • Family happiness.
  • Family.
  • My family is healthy and nearby.  My friends.
  • My family and friends, and kindness to others.
  • That I do the most and best I can with each day of my life.
  • The health (mental and physical) of family and friends and myself. Seeing my grandson finding happiness.
  • Different things matter most to me at different times for related reasons.  It would be most difficult to choose just ONE specific reality in the grand scheme of things that always means the very most to me.  I can only hope you're following my thought process.  I guess I can certainly admit that in all of life & our enormous Universe, my children, their children & loved ones always & forever mean the very most to me. They MATTER beyond belief.
  • The love of the people I love. Really, I considered this and that, but nothing would matter at all if I don’t have the love of the people I love.
  • My relationship with God and my family.
  • Pleasing Jesus Christ as best as I can.
How about you? Let us know your thoughts in the comment section below. This question shows how similar we are in our differences. As ever, thanks to those of you who have responded to some or all of my survey.

ShoutOuts

☙JAWS ~ Lurking in your space! via WarnerWords
☙Angela Torres: Making Lasting Impressions via flashPress

Until next week, wishing you peace and everything that truly matters to you,

​mar
18 Comments
Vicki link
7/6/2016 07:55:17 am

Dear Maria,
When you put these responses together it really does show how so many of us have the same things in life that we care about. I think family health and my own matter very much. Without health life takes on a whole different quality, and certainly not for the better. You could have all the money in the world, but without your mental and physical health it means nothing.
Love and hugs

Reply
Maria link
7/7/2016 07:22:07 pm

Dear Vicki,
Your remarks pull it all together for me - thank you for your wisdom and support.
Sending positive energy and hugs to you - hope you are cool and comfortable. Love, mareer

Reply
Mike
7/6/2016 09:29:27 am

All the lessons taught by Miss Sammie, serve you well. Quite a bit of distilled wisdom in this essay. Happy musings.

Reply
Maria link
7/7/2016 07:23:07 pm

Thanks, dear Mike - right as usual ... :)

Reply
Martie link
7/6/2016 02:18:57 pm

Dear Maria, I absolutely love those profound expressions of Ms Sammy. They have always been applicable and will always be.

What matters most for me will forever be the love of the people I love. May I never disappoint or hurt them, and may I always be able to love them even after they have disappointed or hurt me. I believe God is love and forgiveness and we, humans, are supposed to be his representatives.

Love you lots!

Reply
Maria link
7/7/2016 07:24:45 pm

Your perspectives are insightful and meaningful, dear Martie.

Love you and your POV too, mar

Reply
Peg Cole link
7/7/2016 09:31:27 am

You have a knack for putting things into perspective, learned from your dear Miss Sammie who was wise beyond measure. It was interesting to see the responses from your survey and how they seem to meld as one thought about love.

Reply
Maria link
7/7/2016 07:31:19 pm

Indeed, Peg...'love' is the center of anything important.

Thanks for your remarks and your friendship too. Love, Maria

Reply
Mike
7/7/2016 12:34:46 pm

Some things I heard:

I hold you to take the trash out.
I told you yesterday to mow the lawn.
The school called again!!!!

There is just wisdom everywhere you turn.

Reply
Maria link
7/7/2016 07:34:04 pm

You have tickled my funny bone, dear Mike - in a wise ___ way :)

Reply
femmeflashpoint link
7/7/2016 01:07:25 pm

Prof. Mahreer,

You could take all of Miss Sammie's silver sayings and make the into a little book.

Just sayin' .... ;)

Reply
Maria link
7/7/2016 07:18:54 pm

I'm thinking along the same lines, dear femme - thanks for stopping by and all your assist. :)

Reply
Ruby link
7/7/2016 06:32:29 pm

Hello Mar. It's funny how the little things in our daily living means so much. The love of our family and I've added a new one. Since I moved I've met the most wonderful neighbors. Their names are Faris and Gene Scarlett. They live behind me and we've become close. We attend the same church, Faris and I love to shop. We've even planted a garden together. Her husband, Gene fixed my low tire on my bike. Really having close neighbors is new to me. I love mIss Sammie's philosophy on life. Love you!!

Reply
Maria link
7/7/2016 07:29:00 pm

Dear Ruby,
Faris and Gene sound amazing - just like you! How lovely that you are not only neighbors but friends too.
Thanks for stopping by and sharing. Love you too, mar

Reply
Sunshine
7/8/2016 03:58:59 pm

I have just recently, in the past year learned to realize just how important it is to "sleep on it." It's truly benefited me. Also so true about not knowing what tomorrow will bring. Whether good or bad I've adapted to rejoicing or accepting. Don't have much of a choice.
Thank you for always bringing some extra wisdom into my week. XOXO

Reply
Maria link
7/13/2016 09:05:57 am

You are the wise one, dear Sunshine. I am forever inspired by the examples you set of resiliency and courage.

Thanks for stopping by. Love you, MM

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Sannel link
7/12/2016 06:22:43 pm

Dear Maria,
Growing older and much wiser, or so I hope, I've found the little things in our daily life means the most. When I meet people who are willing to help in any possible way just to help someone in need, two-or four legged creature brings tears of joy to me.
Miss Sammie strike me as a very wise and level headed woman. I would have loved to hear all the wisdom she had to share with everyone. I know that would be something that I had appreciated very much, Such a sweet, and darling soul she must have been. No wonder you miss her so.
Take good care now, dear friend,
Going to bed now in this part of the world.
Love and many hugs to you,
Sannel

Reply
Maria link
7/13/2016 09:10:50 am

Dear Sannel,

Thanks for such a lovely comment. I know my Momma would have loved you and thoroughly appreciate your style and talents - just as I do.

Kindness is so important and sadly / often overlooked.

Grateful for you being in my world - love and kisses to Freddie.

Have a peaceful day (or evening!) Love and hugs to you, Maria

Reply



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    Marcoujor

    Welcome to my desk...

    I am a work in progress, so a rule of thumb is to expect the unexpected every week!

    Pull up a comfy chair and make yourself at home.

    Thank you,

    mar  



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      • Mysterious & Miraculous Book I - News and Reviews
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    • Poetic Ponderings
    • marcoujor on Hubpages
  • I Recommend...
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